HPV FAQ Header Image

Main Menu:

 


 

Add your Personal Experience!

Posted: 12/8/2003

ethical decisions

I'm just wondering about all these people who say that you have to tell new partners even if you haven't had an outbreak in a year - have they told new partners even when they have not had an outbreak in a year? It may sound good in theory to tell someone, but I'm just wondering how many people would be able to jeopardize a relationship even when they have been outbreak free for a while? Be honest here people.

Comments:

12/8/2003 5:41:32 PM - blondee
ahhh this is my whole dilemma... I
agree with you, hell i told my
boyfriend of 2 mos i was sleeping with
unprotectedly when i found out and
coulda caught it from him, and he
wigged out and didnt want to even kiss
me anymore, imagine someone who hasnt
even done anything with you yet and
hasnt even had a chance to catch it...
i guess it just depends on the
situation. My answer is no sex for
now... that way there is no
discussion...

12/8/2003 5:41:41 PM - texina
I'm sorry to be repetitive, but you are
jeopardizing the relationship if you
don't tell. Not only are you running
the risk of infecting your partner, but
you are alsobasing your relationship on
fundamental dishonesty which will have
consequences down the line.

12/8/2003 5:45:46 PM - texina
...I agree that we should all come clean
about whether or not we have "told" but
the point should be to help each other
be honest (it was very hard for me to
do, and I still have one past partner to
tell) rather than creating some kind of
social acceptance for deception.

12/8/2003 6:14:43 PM - AK
Disgression should be used when dropping
the bomb.We should give ourselves a
chance at new relationships,meaning dont
tell until it gets to that point.I took
the route of abstinence for now and
maybe forever.When you meet someone who
actually cares for you and you've had a
relationship minus the sex the issue of
hpv becomes less prevalent especially
marriage wise.If sex is the most
important thing in a our life or
relationship I don't think hpv is the
real problem

12/8/2003 6:22:20 PM - AK
Also just because ppl have been outbreak
free does not mean that HPV is not still
present or that it can't be passed. I
dont have any outbreaks and I still have
HPV unless you are considering dysplasia
an outbreak. I dont like having this
virus so I am not passing it for someone
else to freak out about it unless
marriage comes into play. The more
spreading we do the more ppl have it
soon everyone will have it and thats
not cool.

12/8/2003 8:20:35 PM - Craig
Medical research on HPV is very
inconclusive. You may A. believe your
body rids itself of it or B. believe
you will always have it and keep
spreading it to everyone. You have
doctors that believe both. So since
it is not black and white neither is
the answer to this dilemma.

12/8/2003 8:26:49 PM -
Craig--what makes you think your partner
wouldn't see it as black and white?
What gives you the right to make that
decision for him/her?

12/8/2003 8:34:26 PM - blondee
I have to agree with craig on this
one. Everyones body is different and
everyones circumstances are different.
We cannot judge eachother. one reason
no one wants to "tell" is becuz we dont
want to be judged

12/8/2003 8:37:13 PM - blondee
A note tho, is that we are not your
average sexually active individual
here. we are concerned about the
spread, we got this w/o a choice, and
we dont want others put in teh same
predicament. Casual sex is out of the
question, but i dont think that we are
the type that had casual sex to begin
with. those are the ones that we all
complain about, who are "sluts" and
walking around diseased free...i have
numurous friends like that...

12/8/2003 8:39:01 PM - blondee
I do hope, that when we all meet that
special someone, that they are
understanding, and caring, and that it
doesnt change the way they feel about
us, or look at us differently. We are
telling becuz we care, and I hope that
the person on the other end will
receive the news graciously. If not
they are undeserving of us. until
then, pray for a cure :-)

12/8/2003 8:42:40 PM - Dodden
What I want to know is where are the
vaccines that have been in the works
forever now seems like?? All the links
to those vaccines and updated info are
old yet I've heard nothing new. I'm
the last person that will want to
spread this but I'm tired of dealing
with this dilemma and haveing it ruin
my love life. I don't want to sleep
around I just want to not have to drop
a bomb on someone.

12/8/2003 8:44:33 PM - blondee
dodden-i hear you, you just want to be
able to fall and love and not worry
about the person leaving when you tell
them.. that is my biggest fear! I hate
heartbreak!

12/8/2003 9:00:14 PM -
Latest news I heard is that Merck (the
company with the preventive vaccine in
the pipeline) is running into financial
problems, which could spell trouble.
So, write to Merck and let them know you
care!

12/9/2003 10:03:17 AM - cwissy
PM, I will write but what is their
address or where can I locate it?

12/22/2003 2:45:33 PM -
I'd have to agree with Craig. Besides
what right do people have to force
other people to tell and ruin their
lives? I don't think it's an easy
thing to be a martyr and that decision
should be made by each person. I mean
are you ready to die on the cross? I'm
not.


Return to Personal Experiences  

General Site Information:

About HPV FAQ.com

Site Map

Post Question

New Account

Have feedback?

Copyright HPVFAQ.com 2001-2004 ©

Have some suggestions for improving the site?

Email (not required, kept private):